Tuesday, July 04, 2006

kicking in

phew. reality check. the past 4 days since the end of blocks seemed like a dream. one that i was freely dwelling in and from which i finally i realise i should emerge. got quite abit of shopping under way, gona snap up a few more things after school tmr, though. short day! (: thankfully. service on sunday was great! but as i was leaving i cant help but wonder, sadly, if i can continue attending sunday services =/

anyway, i wonder if we're getting back any papers tmr. im mentally prepared okay. E for math, E for lit, E for econs, C for history, C5/C6 for gp. perhaps, perhaps, perhaps. i took quite some time to slap myself with the unpleasant reality. i pictured everything in my head already. everyone stiffening at the sight of papers; teachers shuffling papers with grim looks; some giving whoops of joy; some sinking into silence; some gloating annoyingly loudly; some handing out sympathetic looks/remarks. i wish i can skip all of it. ALL of it. i just wana grab my papers and go. im tired of pretense. i need to work doubly hard, triply hard. underperforming for the past 1+ yrs isnt a joke. press on, like what pastor tan said last sunday. press on.

well, i glad the conflict's over. prayers do wonders indeed. i learnt something. all of us need new beginnings every now and then.

by exalted! at 4:16 pm |